Something a friend said today..

... struck me. He said he felt like a leaf being blown any which way and ending up wherever he was, rather than having made any conscious attempt to take charge. He could tell I was like that too from my texts. And I must admit I am. I'm letting this situation rule my life more than I should, and I'm not doing so because I'm weak. I'm just... not thinking with my head. Life today is similar to life last year and the year before, give or take some variations. It won't change much next year either.

I guess I feel emptied out.
Or rather, i yearn to burn.